Articles

Unconditional Love and Acceptance?

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Martin Bobgan, PhD.

Among the stellar emotional needs of humanistic psychology are unconditional acceptance, unconditional self-regard, unconditional self-acceptance, and unconditional love. The meaning of the word unconditional is “without conditions or reservations; absolute.”1 The practical extension of the theories of unconditional love is a permissive attitude and a morally nonrestrictive atmosphere. That means no conditions or restrictions in child rearing, counseling, and other human relationships. Since the parent or counselor is to be giving unconditional love, it must be an absolute love, unrestricted by human feelings or failings, since the very meaning of the word is “absolute.” But, if there is any absolute when it comes to love, it is that human love is limited. It is not what it was originally created to be, even in the best of people and circumstances, except when Jesus Himself is loving in and through a person.

Adler and Maslow considered these “unconditionals” to be basic human needs, essential to a person’s sense of wellbeing. They taught that people need to be loved and accepted unconditionally—without any conditions of performance. Thus their followers teach that parents must love and accept their children unconditionally. Moreover, they encourage all people to love and accept themselves unconditionally.

Adler, Maslow, Rogers and others believed that a human being will find answers to his own dilemmas and naturally blossom into his best self in an atmosphere of unconditional love and acceptance, by which they meant a permissive, unstructured atmosphere. Nevertheless, as much as they would like to think that they themselves loved their clients unconditionally, the truth of the matter is this: people are not able to love unconditionally.

The Myth of Unconditional Love

Unconditional love is a myth. That is because the human is naturally self-biased and the human heart is so deceitful that one can fool himself into thinking that he is loving unconditionally, when in fact he has all kinds of conditions. For instance, what kind of unconditional love and unconditional positive regard is at work when the client can no longer pay for services and therapy is discontinued? Furthermore, even the most nondirective counselors express approval or disapproval in subtle, if not direct, ways.2

The idea of people improving their life in an atmosphere of unconditional love is founded on the premise that people are born good and that their natural inclination to goodness is thwarted by their environment (mainly parents). In such a system, self is the victim of society but finds salvation, freedom, and fulfillment through unconditional self-love and self-acceptance. Unconditional love cannot be based upon performance or it wouldn’t be unconditional. Therefore, it must be based on the intrinsic worth of the person. Paul Brownback, in his book The Danger of Self-Love, explains it this way:

. . . by unconditional love we are speaking of love on the basis of being rather than doing. One implication of this teaching is the place of grandeur that it gives to the human being. I am lovable just because I am human; therefore being human, in and of itself, regardless of what I do with my humanness, must have some sort of independent value or worth. It is by itself a sufficient claim to respect and esteem.3

Thus, according to these self theories, everyone is born with the right to receive unconditional love and unconditional acceptance throughout his entire life, no matter what!

Pastors assigned to shepherd God’s flocks, should have been alert to the subtleties of deception that would turn a believer’s eyes from God to self. But alas, rather than warning the sheep, many of the shepherds have joined the psychologists and embrace their teachings of unconditional love and unconditional acceptance.

A Misunderstanding of God’s Love

The basis for their eager embrace is a misunderstanding of the love of God which passes knowledge. They equate unconditional love and acceptance with the fact that God’s love is vast, unfathomable, and unmerited. Then they follow that with the idea that if God loves and accepts people unconditionally, they should also love and accept themselves unconditionally. While this may sound like a logical progression, there are some serious problems with the basic assumptions. Therefore, we must address the question: Is God’s love unconditional? Are there any conditions that must be met to become a recipient of His love?

Paul prayed that the believers in Ephesus would be able to comprehend the breadth, length, depth and height of God’s love. He desired that they know the love of Christ, which surpasses knowledge, so that they would be filled with the fullness of God (Ephesians 3:16-19). The wide expanse of God’s love has been the theme of the gospel throughout the ages, for to know His love is to know Him. Therefore, any consideration of His love is highly important and must be based upon His revelation of Himself rather than upon the imagination of men.

Love According to Secular Humanism

Ever since the rise of secular humanism in this country and especially since the establishment of humanistic psychology, the popular, “relevant” term to describe God’s love has been unconditional. The thrust of this word in humanistic psychology has been both to give and to expect unconditional love from one another with no strings attached. While unconditional love and acceptance supposedly promote change and growth, they make no requirements. But God, who is love, requires and produces radical change—new life—and He enables His children to grow in righteousness.

In humanistic psychology, parents and society are always the culprits. Since they believe that every person is born with intrinsic worth and innate goodness, psychologists contend that one main reason people experience emotional and behavioral problems is because they have not received unconditional love from their parents. Following that thesis, Christians have come to believe that the best kind of love is unconditional love. It is the highest love secular humanists know. It is touted as a love that makes no demands for performance, good behavior, or the like. It has also been associated with a kind of permissiveness, since it makes no demands and has no conditions, even though the promoters of the unconditional love jargon would say that unconditional love does not have to dispense with discipline.

God’s Love Revealed through Scripture

Because the concept of unconditional love permeates society and because it is often thought of as the highest form of human love, it is natural for a Christian to use this term to describe God. After all, His love is far greater than any human love imaginable. God’s love for humanity is so great that “He gave His only begotten Son that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life” (John 3:16). Oh, the magnitude of the cost! We cannot even fathom His love even though our very breath depends upon it! His love indeed reaches to the heights and depths. Nevertheless, is God’s love truly unconditional?

God’s love is available to human beings by grace alone. There is nothing anyone can do to earn that love. There is no good work that is either demanded or even possible. Does that make God’s love unconditional? Because unconditional love is absolute and without any conditions whatsoever, all men would be saved if God’s love were unconditional. But that would be universalism. That would nullify the need for Christ’s sacrificial death and God’s condition of salvation by grace through faith.

We must also ask, does God’s love apply to the person who has sinned against the Holy Spirit by refusing to receive His grace throughout his lifetime and who is destined for hell? God chooses upon whom He will place His love and the benefits of his love. Did Jesus ever imply that God’s love is unconditional? He said to His disciples:

He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him (John 14:21).

One might argue, however, that the story of the prodigal son proves unconditional love. It indeed illustrates the vastness of God’s love, forgiveness and longsuffering. However, the son repented. If he had had a prosperous evil life he may never have repented. And while the father would have waited and hoped, he would not have extended his love. After all, he did not go out searching for him to support his folly. Up to a point this seems to indicate unconditional love, and yet, God is not waiting in ignorance, not knowing what those for whom His son died might be doing. He knows, and there comes a time when those who have refused his offer of love and forgiveness die and face the judgment. It is difficult enough to understand God’s love without adding the term unconditional which is loaded with secular, humanistic, psychological connotations. The story of the prodigal son teaches grace, forgiveness and mercy—but unconditional love? No!

While God loves with a greater love than humans can comprehend, His holiness and justice also must be taken into consideration. Therefore the term unconditional love is inadequate for defining God. It does not account for God’s reaction to pompous men who devise plans against Him and His anointed. The psalmist goes so far as to say:

He that sitteth in the heavens shall laugh: the Lord shall have them in derision. Then shall he speak to them in his wrath, and vex them in his sore displeasure (Psalm 2:4-5).

And what about Lot’s wife as she turned to look at the smoldering cities? Or what about Jesus’ words to the cities that refused to repent?

Woe unto thee, Chorazin! woe unto thee, Bethsaida! for if the mighty works, which were done in you, had been done in Tyre and Sidon, they would have repented long ago in sackcloth and ashes. But I say unto you, It shall be more tolerable for Tyre and Sidon at the day of judgment, than for you. And thou, Capernaum, which art exalted unto heaven, shalt be brought down to hell . . . . it shall be more tolerable for the land of Sodom in the day of judgment, than for thee (Matthew 11:21-24).

Does that sound like unconditional love?

But perhaps one could say that God’s love for the Christian is unconditional since the Christian partakes of His love and grace through faith. Wouldn’t it be better to say that the conditions have been met? Jesus met the first condition, to wash away the sin that God hates. The believer meets the second condition by grace through faith. Or, perhaps it would be better to say that God’s love extended to a person is conditioned by His plan to give eternal life to those who believe on His Son. The conditions of God’s love are resident within Himself.

There is a strong temptation to use vocabulary that is popular in society in order to make Christianity sound relevant. Christians have something far better than what the world offers, but in expressing that good news they confuse people by using words that are already loaded with humanistic connotations and systems of thought. It would be better not to use the expression unconditional love when describing God’s love. There are plenty of other good words.

In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him.

Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. . . .
And we have known and believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him (1 John 4:9, 10, 16).

The incomprehensible magnitude of God’s love surpasses any concept of love devised by humanistic psychologists. The doctrine of unconditional love is a myth that glorifies man rather than God.

1. Webster’s New Universal Unabridged Dictionary, Second Edition, 1983.
2. Jay Haley. Strategies of Psychotherapy. New York: Grune & Stratton, Inc., 1963, pp. 71, 82.
3. Paul Brownback. The Danger of Self-Love. Chicago: Moody Press, 1982, p. 66.

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Articles

4,500 JESUS Tracts have been Hand-Delivered !

These JESUS tracts in Spanish have been handed out person to person with the love of God and the Word of God spoken to the recipients in Spanish!

You have integrally participated in this mission by your prayers and support. We are not finished yet saints.

Saints, you are the ones who make this possible – by your prayers and support. There is no support from any church, ministry, or corporate support. Individual disciples support this work.

FYI: I also help support this work financially in a limited fashion and yet there’s kingdom opportunity for more saints to participate. There are less than 10 saints monthly who support this work financially. God be praised for their participation in our LORD’s Great Commission work (Matthew 28:18-20; Mark 16:15-20). Jesus is coming and remember, Jesus says “No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.” (Luke 9:62).

God be praised that nearly 4,500 JESUS tracts in Spanish have been distributed in Mexico thus far – with a personal touch, a speaking of the Word of God in Spanish to the recipients.

This week I am going to be speaking with a local printer to get another 1,500 printed or 2,500, depending on what resources come in.

The following words of our LORD are specifically spoken to and the grand opportunity and responsibility of the saints in the earth now in this last hour before Christ’s return.

“And this gospel of the kingdom shall be preached in all the world for a witness unto all nations; and then shall the end come.” Matthew 24:14

Reprinting the JESUS tract is at hand. New supply needed. A grand kingdom opportunity is before each of us in this mission.

“Glory hallelujah! God is sure blessing you and the ministry for your faithfulness to Him! And we who pray and support rejoice with you for His Word going out among the beautiful people of Mexico! And we know His Word will not return void but will accomplish that which He set it out to do. Isaiah 55:11.” Tom and Karen Cochran

In general the prices are higher where I am now. $300 should take care of 1,500 copies of the JESUS tract.

Feel free to participate clicking on the Support button on here on safeguardyoursoul.com Takes seconds to contribute.

See the Mission Mexico category for many more pics, videos, and testimonies.

Abiding

“Jesus the Author and Finisher of our Faith” [podcast]

Jesus Christ is the Author and Finisher of our faith and He requires our personal participation both initially and ongoing, as we “endure to the end”, abiding in Him (Matthew 10:22; 24:13; John 15, etc.).

“From that time many of his disciples went back, and walked no more with him. 67 Then said Jesus unto the twelve, Will ye also go away?” John 6:66-67

WHERE O WHERE are we going to go if we depart from Jesus? …. does He, the eternal God and Creator of all things not hold the future of every living soul in His holy hand?

FB Meyer on John 6:60-71

“THE SIFTING OF JESUS’ FOLLOWERS
Christ’s pathetic question-Will ye also go away?-elicited from Peter a reply which proved that the inner meaning of His words had already broken upon their souls. ‘Thy words give us and nourish within us the eternal life.'”

“Then said Jesus unto the twelve, Will ye also go away?” John 6:66-67

There are many today, who like the 5,000 who departed from Christ, leave when they hear the cross message – the divine command to be crucified with Christ. Jesus asks us today: “Will you allow He who authored your faith to finish it?”

“Behold, all souls are mine; as the soul of the father, so also the soul of the son is mine: the soul that sinneth, it shall die.” Ezekiel 18:4

“Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, 2 Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.” Hebrews 12:1-2

“If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. ²Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth. ³For ye are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God. ⁴When Christ, who is our life, shall appear, then shall ye also appear with him in glory.” Colossians 3:1-4

“What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound? ²God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein? ³Know ye not, that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus Christ were baptized into his death? ⁴Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life. ⁵For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection: ⁶knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin. ⁷For he that is dead is freed from sin. ⁸Now if we be dead with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with him: ⁹knowing that Christ being raised from the dead dieth no more; death hath no more dominion over him. ¹⁰For in that he died, he died unto sin once: but in that he liveth, he liveth unto God. ¹¹Likewise reckon ye also yourselves to be dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord. ¹²Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, that ye should obey it in the lusts thereof. ¹³Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin: but yield yourselves unto God, as those that are alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness unto God. ¹⁴For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace. ¹⁵What then? shall we sin, because we are not under the law, but under grace? God forbid. ¹⁶Know ye not, that to whom ye yield yourselves servants to obey, his servants ye are to whom ye obey; whether of sin unto death, or of obedience unto righteousness”? Romans 6:1-16

“In whom are hid all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. ⁴And this I say, lest any man should beguile you with enticing words. ⁵For though I be absent in the flesh, yet am I with you in the spirit, joying and beholding your order, and the stedfastness of your faith in Christ. ⁶As ye have therefore received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk ye in him: ⁷rooted and built up in him, and stablished in the faith, as ye have been taught, abounding therein with thanksgiving. ⁸Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ. ⁹For in him dwelleth all the fulness of the Godhead bodily. ¹⁰And ye are complete in him, which is the head of all principality and power:” Colossians 2:3-10

The Gospel, the Resurrection of Christ

1 Corinthians 15

1 Moreover, brethren, I declare unto you the gospel which I preached unto you, which also ye have received, and wherein ye stand;

2 By which also ye are saved, if ye keep in memory what I preached unto you, unless ye have believed in vain.

3 For I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures;

4 And that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures:

5 And that he was seen of Cephas, then of the twelve:

6 After that, he was seen of above five hundred brethren at once; of whom the greater part remain unto this present, but some are fallen asleep.

7 After that, he was seen of James; then of all the apostles.

8 And last of all he was seen of me also, as of one born out of due time.

Christology | The Cross

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Abiding

“My Sheep Hear My Voice, and I Know them, and they Follow Me” [podcast]

There are 7 portraits of Jesus in the Gospel of John. One of those seven portraits is Jesus our “the good shepherd.” (John 10)

The first thing the good shepherd of the sheep did was give His life to purchase the sheep with His own blood.

“I am the good shepherd: the good shepherd giveth his life for the sheep.” John 10:11

Jesus who created us, then came to die to buy up back to the Father and Himself.

The Bible, God’s Word, is full of illustrations of who God is, and who He is to us. He is our shepherd….the shepherd of His true sheep. How do we know who His remnant saints, sheep truly are? How do we know if we individually are truly His?

“My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: 28 And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. 29 My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father’s hand.” John 10:27-29

“John 10:27
My sheep hear my voice – But ye will not hear: – my sheep follow me; but ye will neither follow nor acknowledge me. Any person who reads without prejudice may easily see, that our Lord does not at all insinuate that these persons could not believe, because God had made it impossible to them; but simply because they did not hear and follow Christ, which the whole of our blessed Lord’s discourse proves that they might have done. The sheep of Christ are not those who are included in any eternal decree, to the exclusion of others from the yearnings of the bowels of eternal mercy; but they are those who hear, believe in, follow, and obey the Savior of the world.” Adam Clarke

We know He is our shepherd if we are reading, listening for, and walking out the voice of His Word. That’s why He gave us His Word. The voice of His Word is His voice. This is why God gave us the Bible, His Word, the “voice” of His Word. Jesus says “My sheep hear my voice” and the “voice” of Jesus is with us, is God’s written Word. We have the “voice”, the very words of our LORD on record. “All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: 17 That the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works.” (2 Timothy 3:16-17)

The primary way God’s voice is heard by His sheep is the Holy Scriptures….. reading God’s Word is hearing the voice of God.

“Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.” Psalms 119:105

“Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself; but whatsoever he shall hear, that shall he speak: and he will shew you things to come. 14 He shall glorify me: for he shall receive of mine, and shall shew it unto you.” John 16:13-14

Our LORD, the good shepherd of our souls, told us that His sheep are those who hear His voice, the voice of His Word. Those not in the Word are not hearing the voice of God.

“He that is of God heareth God’s words: ye therefore hear them not, because ye are not of God.” John 8:47

Those who are “of the truth” hear the voice, the words of Jesus Christ.

“To this end was I born, and for this cause came I into the world, that I should bear witness unto the truth. Every one that is of the truth heareth my voice.” John 18:37

Jesus made it clear who His true sheep are ….

“He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him.” John 14:21

Jesus’ sheep hear His voice, He knows them, they follow Him. They don’t listen to nor follow their own feelings, human reasoning, their own wicked heart, nor any mere men … “follow your heart”? No. That’s a lie from hell. “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?” (Jeremiah 17:9) Jesus died to save you so you would be His, and that you would follow Him, His voice and none other.

Jesus, on record in John 10:27-29, is telling us that it’s only those who are hearing His voice, the voice of His Word, and following Him, who are going to be kept in His holy hand. After being saved, only those who abide in Christ to the end will be kept by Him and with Him eternally. Read John 15:1-6 where you will see that any whom Jesus saves and yet then they don’t “abide” (remain, continue) in Him will be cast into the fire of hell (v6).

Take a closer look at John 10:27-29. Anchor the promise in verses 28-29 on verse 27 where Jesus identifies who His sheep are—those who hear and continue to hear His voice and continue to follow Him (present tense). The divine promise here to be kept is a conditional
promise requiring the individual recipient of the gift of God to continue to hear His voice and follow Him (John 10:27-29). If you are born again, a sheep of Christ’ pasture, and you cease hearing His voice and following Him, you are no long His.

Many today detach, separate our LORD’s words in verse 27 from verses 28-29 of John 10. In doing so, they perpetrate their “eternal security” mythology which is Satan’s first lie (Genesis 2:17; 3:4). Beware as this was the first lie Satan told mankind, which led to the fall (Genesis 2:17; 3:4).

The LORD saved you to be His – to hear the voice of His Word and to follow Him, to walk with Him.

“Who are kept by the power of God through faith unto salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.” 1 Peter 1:5

To be kept you must live “through faith” – to hear and believe the voice of His Word, and walk with Him accordingly.

“But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.” Hebrews 11:6

“Eternal security”, otherwise known as “once saved always saved”, is a lie from hell. Run from any and all wolves peddling this, Satan’s first lie (Genesis 2:17; 3:4).

To be “kept” by Jesus, the saved sheep must live his life “through faith.”

“And the apostles said unto the Lord, Increase our faith.” Luke 17:5

The recipient of salvation must “through faith” be “kept.” God never removes man’s free will and requires not only initial but also continued faith. Jesus foretold that some would be saved and then not continue with Him and “fall away” (Luke 8:12-13).

“Receiving the end of your faith, even the salvation of your souls.” 1 Peter 1:9

Prayer: Father, I know You are holy and require my faith to the end of this life. Make sensitive my conscience, quicken my spirit to repentance and to be holy as You are holy. In Jesus’ name.

Jesus Christ our LORD is “that great shepherd of the sheep.”

“Now the God of peace, that brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great shepherd of the sheep, through the blood of the everlasting covenant, 21 Make you perfect in every good work to do his will, working in you that which is wellpleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ; to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen.” Hebrews 13:20-21

“For he is our God; and we are the people of his pasture, and the sheep of his hand. To day if ye will hear his voice,” Psalms 95:7

“Know ye that the LORD he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.” Psalms 100:3

“To hear His voice, we submit to the pruning of the Holy Ghost in our heart. The fruit of righteousness can only be produced in an ABIDING relationship with Jesus and cultivated by the Holy Spirit given to them that OBEY him. (John 15:3-5; 14:15-17)” Jon Crane

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“He that is of God heareth God’s words: ye therefore hear them not, because ye are not of God.” John 8:47 A long time friend of mine, after realizing the above, said: “Thank you for the lambasting.” “For we are not as many, which corrupt the word of God: but as of sincerity, but as of God, in the sight of God speak we in Christ.” 2 Corinthians 2:17 “A wise man will hear, and will increase learning; and a man of understanding shall attain unto wise counsels:” Proverbs 1:5 “Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be yet wiser: […]

Filled with Heaven's Fuel [podcast]

“Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. 13 For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.” Philippians 2:12-13 The Holy Scriptures assure us that God is working in each of His people, who are His vessels, His temples. He is doing that as they “work out” their “salvation with fear and trembling” (Philippians 2:12-13). The individual members and the corporate body of Christ are truly upholding Jesus […]

Teach the Bible [podcast]

JESUS IS COMING AND THE TRUE BODY OF CHRIST IS “HOLDING FORTH (BOLDLY DECLARING) THE WORD OF LIFE” “Holding forth the word of life; that I may rejoice in the day of Christ, that I have not run in vain, neither laboured in vain.” Philippians 2:16 WHEN you speak God’s Word, you are speaking divine authority. “These things speak, and exhort, and rebuke with all authority. Let no man despise thee.” Titus 2:15 “And Jesus came and spake unto them, saying, All power is given unto me in heaven and in earth. 19 Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, […]