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Unmarried and Desire a Godly Mate?

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ATTN UNMARRIED DISCIPLE: A person who isn’t consumed with Christ does NOT qualify for you! Dare we waste the one life God gives us on earth married to an enemy of Christ?

Though there are other natural attractions, the primary attraction between unmarried Christians must be Christ!

The world has made it all about the 2-hour wedding, the average which costs tens of thousand$, and not about the relationship, the lifelong marriage.

SO you met someone who isn’t excited that you are saved? Not your mate!

ARE YOU UNMARRIED? – “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?” (2 Corinthians 6:14)

IF you are truly born again, you are not looking for A mate who isn’t (2 Corinthians 6:14).

CANDIDATE FOR A MATE? THERE’S no way it’s going to work unless they are truly born again, Holy Spirit filled, and seeking Jesus daily! We waste our time vainly thinking that it could be God’s will to unite us with anything less than a full blown born again disciple who is presently serving Jesus daily. It’s not. Remember the LORD owns all souls, made and owns this whole planet, and has that one precious saint to unite you with. Saint of Christ, perhaps today, you may wish to pause, get before God in prayer, and ask HIM to bring you together with that one born again disciple of His for marriage – desiring to humbly serve and be a blessing to that mate, helping prayerfully to see God fulfill His perfect, fruitful will in their life! Ask Him to get your own house in order, to prepare you for the ROLE (male/female) He’s ordained you to fulfill in that marriage.

MARRY someone who appreciates and celebrates your life with Jesus! Equal yoking!

You are asking God to give you the gift of one of His true followers as your mate for this life, right? God knows we don’t want a lukewarm counterfeit, right? In light of this, please allow me to suggest that you make it clear up front when you meet someone. Recently I did just that. Here’s what I stated to a lady who professed to be a Christian soon after we met:

“I am praying for a wife who is first and foremost a truly God fearing born again disciple of Jesus.”

Get it out there saints. Use Bible words like “born again.” (John 3:3, 7) If they aren’t authentically in Christ, you don’t want them for a mate! Remember, you are praying and looking for that ONE special person! Praise God for eliminating counterfeits. | What it means to be born again.

The truly born again disciple of Jesus is learning to consent to the cross life. The LORD is preparing those of His who are learning the daily cross – for a successful marriage that glorifies Him. ABS = Always Be Serving. Lay down your life (Philippians 2).

“For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.” Ephesians 5:23

When a godly woman marries a man, she is trusting him to lead her and the family in the right ways of the LORD. Remember ladies, when you agree to marry a man, you are agreeing to submit to his headship. This is a non negotiable divine truth. Christ is the Head of the man and the man is the head of the woman.

“But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.” 1 Corinthians 11:3

ATTENTION UNMARRIED CHRISTIAN: KNOW exactly what you are looking for! Make no excuse for anyone! Never mind the “but but but he’s this or she’s that….” Refuse to prop someone up! Discern, look for their real fruit! Do they talk about Jesus? Are they learning God’s Word? Are they laying down their life daily, denying self to serve Jesus and others? (Matthew 22:37-40) If they aren’t truly born again, unashamed of and serving Jesus daily – RUN! If they don’t honor you as Jesus would have all Christians do, RUN! Otherwise, you are walking into a trap of un-expressible horror/proportions! Just ask another believer who has married a counterfeit!

The young woman who was the person God used to get me saved, stood firm in Christ. We were attracted to each other physically, but she wasted no time telling me (at that time still a sinner) that I needed to get saved or she would have no relationship with me. She knew this 2 Corinthians 6:14 verse well and lived it. She was physically stunning by the way and not about to sacrifice her life with Christ for any man, though she desired marriage ultimately.

IT DOES NOT matter how much you WANT/WISH someone is saved-that DOES NOT mean they are! fruit!

IF you are entertaining the thought of marrying someone who is not grounded soundly in God’s Word and love, you are walking into an unequal yoking trap and will suffer long for such.

IF someone doesn’t esteem and highly honor the work of Christ in you and your calling to humbly serve Him, they are not God’s gift/mate for you. It’s a closed door. Check out how Abigail addresses David who later became her husband. Read this closely, prayerfully.

If she/he’s not turned on by your life in Christ, he/she’s a counterfeit!

ARE you unmarried and praying for a godly mate for an equally yoked marriage? Amen. Try finding someone else in the same state and lift them up to the LORD in prayer. Give your life in prayer for other of Christ’s saints. Acts 20:35, amen?

The Abigail and David Example

Recently a brother in Christ told me about a Christian lady he is courting. He said: “She’s very sweet and very caring and she respects me. She honors me.”

Wow now this is the kind of godly person every unmarried Christian should pray for, right?

“(Abigail speaking to David) I pray thee, forgive the trespass of thine handmaid: for the LORD will certainly make my lord a sure house; because my lord fighteth the battles of the LORD, and evil hath not been found in thee all thy days. 29 Yet a man is risen to pursue thee, and to seek thy soul: but the soul of my lord shall be bound in the bundle of life with the LORD thy God; and the souls of thine enemies, them shall he sling out, as out of the middle of a sling. 30 And it shall come to pass, when the LORD shall have done to my lord according to all the good that he hath spoken concerning thee, and shall have appointed thee ruler over Israel; 31 That this shall be no grief unto thee, nor offence of heart unto my lord, either that thou hast shed blood causeless, or that my lord hath avenged himself: but when the LORD shall have dealt well with my lord, then remember thine handmaid.” 1 Samuel 25:28-31

David’s response to Abigail was equally as godly and endearing:

“And David said to Abigail, Blessed be the LORD God of Israel, which sent thee this day to meet me: 33 And blessed be thy advice, and blessed be thou, which hast kept me this day from coming to shed blood, and from avenging myself with mine own hand. 34 For in very deed, as the LORD God of Israel liveth, which hath kept me back from hurting thee, except thou hadst hasted and come to meet me, surely there had not been left unto Nabal by the morning light any that pisseth against the wall. 35 So David received of her hand that which she had brought him, and said unto her, Go up in peace to thine house; see, I have hearkened to thy voice, and have accepted thy person.” 1 Samuel 25:32-35

When Nabal, her first husband died, David sent for Abigail to be his wife. Her response was fabulously godly:

And when the servants of David were come to Abigail to Carmel, they spake unto her, saying, David sent us unto thee, to take thee to him to wife. 41 And she arose, and bowed herself on her face to the earth, and said, Behold, let thine handmaid be a servant to wash the feet of the servants of my lord. 42 And Abigail hasted, and arose, and rode upon an ass, with five damsels of hers that went after her; and she went after the messengers of David, and became his wife.” 1 Samuel 25:40-42

Dear Unmarried Christian: ARE YOU praying and looking for someone who is rich this fleeting world? Or, are you truly Christ’s and therefore sanctified and looking for someone who is rich in Christ, in faith, in humility, and in the Scriptures?

Is your view of success God’s? What do the Scriptures teach? So very many unmarried people looking for someone who is successful in this world instead of a successful, cross-bearing disciple of Christ. Ungodly, Carnal, Self-serving, Horrible marriage coming for those who choose unwisely-outside of the truth of Scripture. Are you looking for a true disciple or someone who loves this present, fleeting world and is therefore the enemy of Christ? (Luke 16:15; James 4:4; 1 John 2:15-17)

IF you are making excuses for someone’s rebellion instead of honestly assessing the situation, that’s going to come back to haunt you! FRUIT! (Matthew 3:7-10; 7:16, 20)

It’s REAL SIMPLE: When a person is right with God: They live to serve God and others, not self! (Matthew 22:37-40)

The LORD was using her and she invited me to a tent meeting where for the first time in my life, I heard the Gospel of the grace of God in Christ Jesus and was saved.

CLUE for the unmarried: If 2 people aren’t FINDING ways to be together, that’s a closed door.

If you are unmarried and desire a mate, step back and evaluate whether or not the person or people you may be considering are truly and genuinely born again.

Recently, a sister in Christ who desires to be married asked me what she should be looking for in a man. She said she has had several relationships with men who claim to be Christians, but the fruit of their daily lives did not testify to a relationship with Christ. I told her that if a man is not first born again, confessing Jesus, engaging in a life of prayer with Jesus, and in the Word of God daily, he is not a true disciple and not a candidate for a God-fearing woman.

What are you doing to demonstrate to Christ that you are prepared to serve your mate in marriage? The cross – where we are serving Jesus and others, not self – is the only way a godly, good relationship can happen. Is the cross in your personal life and therefore your relationships? The Daily Cross

The LORD MUST be First, Not Your Mate!

God is Jealous! (Exodus 34:14) He will not be second to anyone but MUST be your “FIRST love” – first priority in all things (Revelation 2:4-5). It’s only out of the life that is truly loving, worshipping, obeying God that HIS divine love will flow and make marriage ultimate! The cross!

Jeni Marie Lorance writes:

“But we must beware of the tendency to begin to love our spouse more than our God. Then it becomes a curse. No one comes before GOD.

There was a time I desired so much a spouse. The Lord told me, “You want him so badly…but I want you and your ignoring me.”

Let that NEVER be said of me again.

Now I say, “Lord, I’d rather live single and do your will and be passionately in love with YOU. ”

And I mean it. (And God knows I mean it)

It’s better to be in love with God and have no one than to be on love with someone else and our relationship with God suffer.

But of course you can have both thriving.”

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IF you desire to truly hear from GOD, read His own Word for yourself. King James Bible.

“Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” 2 Timothy 2:15

“All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: 17 that the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works.” 2 Timothy 3:16-17

“Nourished Up” – like a wise virgin Heaven bound saint.

“If thou put the brethren in remembrance of these things, thou shalt be a good minister of Jesus Christ, nourished up in the words of faith and of good doctrine, whereunto thou hast attained.” 1 Timothy 4:6

On this biblical topic of fervency, of being “fervent in spirit”, one commentary offers the following:

“Nourished up in the words of faith” is a biblical phrase from 1 Timothy 4:6, meaning to be continually fed, strengthened, and built up by scripture, sound Christian teaching, and doctrine, much like food sustains the body, these spiritual words sustain and grow the soul, leading to spiritual maturity and a deeper walk with God. It signifies a deliberate, ongoing intake of God’s truth, which fosters growth, guards against false teachings, and fuels a believer’s life.” (Source?)

It’s one thing to have a mere human giving you encouragement and yet another thing to get your encouragement, your spiritual nourishment from God—directly. King James Bible.

Psalms 73

“Truly God is good to Israel, even to such as are of a clean heart.

2 But as for me, my feet were almost gone; my steps had well nigh slipped.

3 For I was envious at the foolish, when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.

4 For there are no bands in their death: but their strength is firm.

5 They are not in trouble as other men; neither are they plagued like other men.

6 Therefore pride compasseth them about as a chain; violence covereth them as a garment.

7 Their eyes stand out with fatness: they have more than heart could wish.

8 They are corrupt, and speak wickedly concerning oppression: they speak loftily.

9 They set their mouth against the heavens, and their tongue walketh through the earth.

10 Therefore his people return hither: and waters of a full cup are wrung out to them.

11 And they say, How doth God know? and is there knowledge in the most High?

12 Behold, these are the ungodly, who prosper in the world; they increase in riches.

13 Verily I have cleansed my heart in vain, and washed my hands in innocency.

14 For all the day long have I been plagued, and chastened every morning.

15 If I say, I will speak thus; behold, I should offend against the generation of thy children.

16 When I thought to know this, it was too painful for me;

17 Until I went into the sanctuary of God; then understood I their end.

18 Surely thou didst set them in slippery places: thou castedst them down into destruction.

19 How are they brought into desolation, as in a moment! they are utterly consumed with terrors.

20 As a dream when one awaketh; so, O Lord, when thou awakest, thou shalt despise their image.

21 Thus my heart was grieved, and I was pricked in my reins.

22 So foolish was I, and ignorant: I was as a beast before thee.

23 Nevertheless I am continually with thee: thou hast holden me by my right hand.

24 Thou shalt guide me with thy counsel, and afterward receive me to glory.

25 Whom have I in heaven but thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee.

26 My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever.

27 For, lo, they that are far from thee shall perish: thou hast destroyed all them that go a whoring from thee.

28 But it is good for me to draw near to God: I have put my trust in the Lord GOD, that I may declare all thy works.”