UNMARRIED MEN, WHO DESIRE TO BE MARRIED, HAVE THE DIVINE ASSIGNMENT OF FINDING A WIFE
(by Push TO UMinistry on Facebook – Edited by Stephen Michels)
“Whoso findeth a Contact Email findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.” Proverbs 18:22
“We should not attempt to deny the God-given attraction between male and female. No, instead we must live that daily cross so that such affections are in check – crucified – and no “inordinate affection” (lust, concupiscence) is manifesting (Colossians 3:1-5). In fact, in this very passage we see that when the affections of our hearts are set upon the LORD Himself, His power within us will be resident to crucify the deeds of the body, including lust. Read Colossians 3; Galatians 5:16-26; 1 Corinthians 7:1-5.” Todd Tomasella
God called you to be a spiritual leader, to be a protector, to be an example of Christ’s love for the church.
(1) Maximize your time with God. Read and study the Word of God. Serve the LORD daily. Die to yourself and minister to others.
(2) Do not date/court people with whom you are unequally yoked- (A) NON-BELIEVERS, (B) BELIEVERS WHO HAVE DIFFERENT THEOLOGICAL BELIEFS THAN YOURS. Never date a woman who is stuck in her religious traditions and is not teachable. Only court one woman at a time. Do not ignore women whom God puts in front of you- women you meet while fellowshipping and doing Christ’s work, etc.
(3) Examine the woman’s character – “Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.” (Proverbs 31:30) Does she love the LORD, or does she just love her pastor and her church? There’s a huge difference here. If she is loving the LORD with all her being, she is helping others and not living to please herself. Is she wise? Is she unselfish? Is she kind? Would you feel proud to introduce her to others? Do you feel honored to be with her? Are you becoming a better man by knowing her? Are you growing in your relationship with God, because of her example?
(4) Do not allow yourself to be rushed into turning the relationship into romance. Build a strong friendship with her first. Guard your heart, and then wait to hear from the LORD. ALLOW THE HOLY SPIRIT TO GUIDE YOU REGARDING WHETHER OF NOT you should proceed further.
(4) Never place a woman in a position of dishonor. Respect a woman’s body as a temple for the holy spirit. Recognize that when you are with her, whether in person, on the phone, on the internet, or via text–Jesus is there with the two of you, and you should not do or say anything that would be inappropriate in His eyes. – The Bible says that godly men are to treat “The elder women as mothers; the younger as sisters, with all purity.” (1 Timothy 5:2)
(5) Do not allow others to speak negatively about her in front of you.
(6) Be certain that she is not making an idol of you. God will not allow such – before or after marriage. He is a Jealous God (Exodus 20:3-4; 34:14). If a woman is not sincerely seeking the face of the LORD, she may be prone to idolize you. Encourage her to focus more on her relationship with the LORD.
(7) Beware of the many women today who, though claiming to be saved, are full of self – self-absorbed, self-seeking, and not given to serving God and others. A truly God-fearing woman is very rare. – ” Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” Proverbs 31:10
(8) Pray with her and pray for her. Invite her to fellowship with the people you fellowship with. Teach her God’s Word and help her to grow spiritually.
(9) If you plan to take her out, it would be advisable to invite another couple to go with you.
(10) Avoid spending too much time alone with her, especially at your place or at her place.
(11) It’s easy to get lonely as an unmarried person and this can lead one to make a rash decision. It’s easy to come together with a person of the opposite gender. Consider this – Are you two really compatible? Does she expect that when she gets married, her husband will buy her a 12 bedroom house, while you just want to live in a small country house on a farm, serving the LORD in humility and helping others? If you have been called to serve Jesus in full-time ministry, will she be supportive of that?
(12) Consider this – If you had daughters, would you want them to be like her? If you had sons, would you want them to marry a woman like her?
(13) Do you balance each other out? Are your weaknesses her strengths? Are her weaknesses your strengths?
(14) In a gracious way, find out if she seeks the LORD in His Word and prayer communion daily, mornings preferred since that reveals a person’s obedience to truly put Him first (Matthew 6:33).
I just received this email from a blessed brother who is unmarried and seeking a God-fearing wife:
“Had a great first date with Susan and Friday night I am going over to her mom’s house to meet her. We are all having dinner together. Susan has a kind and gentle spirit and, during our conversation, she stated something that I have NEVER heard a woman that I have dated say before. She said that she has learned that there can only be one head in a marriage and that it is the man. I replied that a true leader is a servant leader just like Jesus, and sacrifices everything for the one he loves. That is 1 Corinthians 13 love. She was also glad to hear that I attend a nondenominational Christian church… Thank you so much for your prayers, brother. I am very excited about our prospects so far! God is good and He answers our prayers, brother.” SM
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Abiding
Going Directly to the Source [podcast]
IF you desire to truly hear from GOD, read His own Word for yourself. King James Bible.
“Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” 2 Timothy 2:15
“All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: 17 that the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works.” 2 Timothy 3:16-17
“Nourished Up” – like a wise virgin Heaven bound saint.
“If thou put the brethren in remembrance of these things, thou shalt be a good minister of Jesus Christ, nourished up in the words of faith and of good doctrine, whereunto thou hast attained.” 1 Timothy 4:6
On this biblical topic of fervency, of being “fervent in spirit”, one commentary offers the following:
“Nourished up in the words of faith” is a biblical phrase from 1 Timothy 4:6, meaning to be continually fed, strengthened, and built up by scripture, sound Christian teaching, and doctrine, much like food sustains the body, these spiritual words sustain and grow the soul, leading to spiritual maturity and a deeper walk with God. It signifies a deliberate, ongoing intake of God’s truth, which fosters growth, guards against false teachings, and fuels a believer’s life.” (Source?)
It’s one thing to have a mere human giving you encouragement and yet another thing to get your encouragement, your spiritual nourishment from God—directly. King James Bible.

Psalms 73
“Truly God is good to Israel, even to such as are of a clean heart.
2 But as for me, my feet were almost gone; my steps had well nigh slipped.
3 For I was envious at the foolish, when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.
4 For there are no bands in their death: but their strength is firm.
5 They are not in trouble as other men; neither are they plagued like other men.
6 Therefore pride compasseth them about as a chain; violence covereth them as a garment.
7 Their eyes stand out with fatness: they have more than heart could wish.
8 They are corrupt, and speak wickedly concerning oppression: they speak loftily.
9 They set their mouth against the heavens, and their tongue walketh through the earth.
10 Therefore his people return hither: and waters of a full cup are wrung out to them.
11 And they say, How doth God know? and is there knowledge in the most High?
12 Behold, these are the ungodly, who prosper in the world; they increase in riches.
13 Verily I have cleansed my heart in vain, and washed my hands in innocency.
14 For all the day long have I been plagued, and chastened every morning.
15 If I say, I will speak thus; behold, I should offend against the generation of thy children.
16 When I thought to know this, it was too painful for me;
17 Until I went into the sanctuary of God; then understood I their end.
18 Surely thou didst set them in slippery places: thou castedst them down into destruction.
19 How are they brought into desolation, as in a moment! they are utterly consumed with terrors.
20 As a dream when one awaketh; so, O Lord, when thou awakest, thou shalt despise their image.
21 Thus my heart was grieved, and I was pricked in my reins.
22 So foolish was I, and ignorant: I was as a beast before thee.
23 Nevertheless I am continually with thee: thou hast holden me by my right hand.
24 Thou shalt guide me with thy counsel, and afterward receive me to glory.
25 Whom have I in heaven but thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee.
26 My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever.
27 For, lo, they that are far from thee shall perish: thou hast destroyed all them that go a whoring from thee.
28 But it is good for me to draw near to God: I have put my trust in the Lord GOD, that I may declare all thy works.”
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Abiding
“Fervent in Spirit” [podcast]
“Not slothful in business; fervent in spirit; serving the Lord;” Romans 12:11
Concerning being “fervent in spirit,” one commentator notes that this means to:
“Maintain zeal to the boiling point.” Dake
“Fervent” – A primary verb; to be hot (boil, of liquids; or glow, of solids), that is, (figuratively) be fervid (earnest): – be fervent.
“Do nothing at any time but what is to the glory of God, and do every thing as unto him; and in every thing let your hearts be engaged.” Adam Clarke
“Never let your zeal flag (lag, drop, tank), maintain the spiritual glow, serve the Lord.” Here we are reminded of the words of Jeremiah 48:10: ‘Cursed be he that doeth the work of the LORD deceitfully,'” Believer’s Bible Commentary
Apollos was “fervent in the spirit.”
“This man was instructed in the way of the Lord; and being FERVENT in the spirit, he spake and taught diligently the things of the Lord, knowing only the baptism of John.” Acts 18:25
In all things Christ’s saints are to be “fervent in spirit”:
“Not slothful in business; FERVENT in spirit; serving the Lord;” Romans 12:11
Disciples of Jesus are to have a “fervent mind” toward all saints and ministers of His blessed Gospel:
“And not by his coming only, but by the consolation wherewith he was comforted in you, when he told us your earnest desire, your mourning, your FERVENT mind toward me; so that I rejoiced the more.” 2 Corinthians 7:7
“Fervent prayer” is to be offered to God for other of His saints:
“Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual FERVENT prayer of a righteous man availeth much.” James_5:16
Jesus’ people are to have “fervent charity among” ourselves:
“And above all things have FERVENT charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.” 1 Peter 4:8
“Fervent heat” will soon consume the wicked who refused the salvation that comes from Christ alone:
“But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with FERVENT heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up.” 2 Peter 3:10
“Looking for and hasting unto the coming of the day of God, wherein the heavens being on fire shall be dissolved, and the elements shall melt with FERVENT heat.” 2 Peter 3:12
On this biblical topic of fervency, of being “fervent in spirit”, one commentary offers the following:
“2 Peter 3:
To be ‘fervent in spirit’ means to have intense, burning passion, zeal, and enthusiasm for spiritual matters, often linked to serving God, rather than being lukewarm or apathetic. It implies being ‘boiled’ with spiritual energy, actively engaged, and diligent in faith, as described in Romans 12:11, (‘not slothful in business, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord’). It’s a passionate, fiery commitment, distinct from fanaticism, involving earnest application and a deep love for God.
Key aspects:
- Intensity: A deep, glowing, or boiling heat of emotion and dedication.
- Diligence: Not being lazy or half-hearted, but actively applying oneself to spiritual duties.
- Spiritual Zeal: A strong desire and excitement for God’s will, the Gospel, and spiritual growth.
- Source: Often described as being moved by the Holy Spirit, a fire within.
- Biblical Example: Apollos was described as ‘fervent in the spirit’ as he taught diligently about the Lord (Acts 18:25).
- Passionate prayer
- Diligent study of God’s Word
- Active, loving service to others
- Bold witnessing for faith
- Being ‘on fire’ for God, not lukewarm”
Jesus says that those in His church who are “lukewarm” will be spued or rejected (Revelation 3:15-16). What’s the opposite of being “lukewarm”? – being “fervent in spirit.”
“Amen! Don’t let your fire die as the church in Laodicea did! They were neither cold nor hot. They were lukewarm. Comfortable! Indifferent! Their fire for the Lord had gone out. God’s not looking for people who play it safe but people who burn with fire for Him!!!” Karen Cochran
YOUR PRAYER: LORD, make me Yours. Please keep me close to You, NO MATTER what it takes. Break me dear LORD. Let the holy light of Your presence permeate and shine through my inner man. I am Your temple Jesus. Shine Your light on all darkness. I love You my LORD. In Jesus’ name.
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Abiding
It’s not all Going to be Pretty [podcast]
“Thou therefore endure hardness, as a good soldier of Jesus Christ.” 2 Timothy 2:3
One of Paul’s resumes of the sufferings he endured as an apostle of Jesus Christ.
2 Corinthians 6:3-10
“3 Giving no offence in any thing, that the ministry be not blamed:
4 But in all things approving ourselves as the ministers of God, in much patience, in afflictions, in necessities, in distresses,
5 In stripes, in imprisonments, in tumults, in labours, in watchings, in fastings;
6 By pureness, by knowledge, by longsuffering, by kindness, by the Holy Ghost, by love unfeigned,
7 By the word of truth, by the power of God, by the armour of righteousness on the right hand and on the left,
8 By honour and dishonour, by evil report and good report: as deceivers, and yet true;
9 As unknown, and yet well known; as dying, and, behold, we live; as chastened, and not killed;
10 As sorrowful, yet alway rejoicing; as poor, yet making many rich; as having nothing, and yet possessing all things.”
You are His. Cling to Him. The LORD Jesus is going to bring you through, not matter what you face (Deuteronomy 13:4).
“But now thus saith the LORD that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine. 2 When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.” Isaiah 43:1-2
“Hated”
“And ye shall be hated of all men for my name’s sake: but he that endureth to the end shall be saved.” Matthew 10:22
“Ye shall Laugh”
“And he lifted up his eyes on his disciples, and said, Blessed be ye poor: for yours is the kingdom of God. 21 Blessed are ye that hunger now: for ye shall be filled. Blessed are ye that weep now: for ye shall laugh. 22 Blessed are ye, when men shall hate you, and when they shall separate you from their company, and shall reproach you, and cast out your name as evil, for the Son of man’s sake.” Luke 6:20-22
“Through much Tribulation”
“Confirming the souls of the disciples, and exhorting them to continue in the faith, and that we must through much tribulation enter into the kingdom of God.” Acts 14:22
Eternity with Christ, “with Joy”
“For ye shall go out with joy, and be led forth with peace: the mountains and the hills shall break forth before you into singing, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands.” Isaiah 55:12
“To Make them White”
“And such as do wickedly against the covenant shall he corrupt by flatteries: but the people that do know their God shall be strong, and do exploits. 33 And they that understand among the people shall instruct many: yet they shall fall by the sword, and by flame, by captivity, and by spoil, many days. 34 Now when they shall fall, they shall be holpen with a little help: but many shall cleave to them with flatteries. 35 And some of them of understanding shall fall, to try them, and to purge, and to make them white, even to the time of the end: because it is yet for a time appointed.” Daniel 11:32-35
“Made white … the wise shall understand”
“Many shall be purified, and made white, and tried; but the wicked shall do wickedly: and none of the wicked shall understand; but the wise shall understand.” Daniel 12:10
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