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“Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and IF HE REPENT, forgive him. 4 And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him.” Luke 17:3-4

Though we should forgive from our hearts those who harm us, forgiving seems to be spoken of here as concerning bringing them back into fellowship. It’s one thing to forgive someone in your heart and another thing to continue to spend time and energy on a relationship with them.

Of this passage, John Wesley wrote:

“If he sin against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day return, saying, I repent – That is, if he give sufficient proof that he does really repent, after having sinned ever so often, receive him just as if he had never sinned against thee. But this forgiveness is due only to real penitents. In a lower sense we are to forgive all, penitent or impenitent; (so as to bear them the sincerest good will, and to do them all the good we can;) and that not seven times only, but seventy times seven.”

Wondering about reconciling with someone? You will know when someone should be back in your life when they truly repent and openly confess their sins before the LORD and their offence against you. And, until they do this, you can know they have not repented before the LORD. WHEN they truly repent before the LORD, He will send them back to you to sincerely admit they were wrong. Fruit.

God requires that we forgive and yet, He also instructed us not to give our pearls to the swine – don’t put yourself in harms way unnecessarily by remaining in fellowship with those who have not truly repented and therefore are under the influence, the control of and operate according to the agenda of their father, the devil – to steal, to kill, and to destroy (Mark 11:25-26; Matthew 7:6; John 10:10).

“Neither give place to the devil.” Ephesians 4:27

God’s Word commands us to forgive and yet, this is qualified. That’s not all it says.

QUESTION RECEIVED:

“Are we to still forgive them even if they never repent to God or apologize to us? What is true forgiveness? The world has their ways but I want to know what it really looks like.”

REPLY:

Yes we must forgive and yet, receiving them back into our lives seems to be another issue.

We must of necessity view all things from the full counsel of God’s Word. Remember: It was the LOVE and MERCY manifested to the unrepentant fornicator which was the goodness of God which led him to repentance, lest he perish irrevocably in hell.

In Luke 17, Jesus seems to teach that we are not to let some offending brother back until they repent. He is not to be shown the LORD’s acceptance until he truly repents and that will always bring forth making amends with those he’s offended (fruit). Offending one of God’s children is punishable by eternal damnation:

“Then said he unto the disciples, It is impossible but that offences will come: but woe unto him, through whom they come! 2 It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.” Luke 17:1-2

This teaching from our LORD seems to coincide with His teaching about not giving that which is holy to dogs (Matthew 7:6). Church Discipline

Forgive unconditionally from the heart yes and yet there’s the Luke 17:1-4 teaching.

PERHAPS we should today consider that God is attempting to protect His children. Following His wisdom, His Word, will do just that (Proverbs 30:5). Those who allow a swine, a heretic, to remain in close range, will again be stabbed in the back by that swine (Matthew 7:6; Titus 3:10). Swine – unrepentant evil doers are to be rejected (Titus 3:10). In this life, there are people you will have to forgive and also, to get out of your life, to keep them at a distance. Beware of the Swine

“Years ago I was hurt by a certain person, and when I found myself in a prayer meeting with that one lady I felt I should ask her for forgiveness if I had offended her someway and the Lord spoke clearly and immediately, saying, ‘Do not cast your pearls before swine’ and stopped me seconds before I asked.” Anita A.

Perhaps we can say that if we forgive too early, we may hurt someone – prevent them getting right with God due to the divine working of repentance not being able to take its full course.

“Now I rejoice, not that ye were made sorry, but that ye sorrowed to repentance: for ye were made sorry after a godly manner, that ye might receive damage by us in nothing. 10 For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death.” 2 Corinthians 7:9-10

Repentance is a yielding to the conviction of the Spirit upon our conscience. Repentance is a work of God and yet GOD requires that we hearken to it. Repentance is an absolute work of God and yes He made it an essential (Luke 13:3, 5, etc.). Repentance is the very first word of the Gospel (Matthew 3:2; 4:17; Acts 2:38; 3:19; 17:30-31, etc.).

“True repentance is actually speaking of firstly an internal change more than outward expression or external change of behavior.”

The inward change by the working of the Spirit of God will always bring the fruit of that change on the outward (Matthew 3:7-10). In this case that would bring forth the fruit of an apology, readily confessing ones sin, wrongdoing – a leaving of ones gift before the altar until things are cleared up (Matthew 5:23-24; James 5:16).

Repentance is a gift and yet that gift must be received and CAN be rejected:

“And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient, 25 In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will GIVE (it’s a gift) them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth; 26 And that they may recover themselves out of the snare of the devil, who are taken captive by him at his will.” 2 Timothy 2:24-26

Remember, when someone sins against God by deliberately harming a one of God’s people, it’s only because their own heart is not right with God.

The consequences for harming one of Christ’s people is severe and will be eternally irrevocably if that sinning soul isn’t brought to repentance. Jesus issues this severe warning:

“But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.” Matthew 18:6

When a professing believer wrongs you, this is no excuse to retain hatred in your heart toward them even though there’s a separation and before there’s a reconciliation or restoring of fellowship. God will not forgive us lest we forgive others from our hearts (Matthew 6:14-16; 18:21-35; Mark 11:25-25).

God is not going to bless our lives unless we are willing to sincerely admit our sins, repent and confess them, and make amends (restitution) with anyone we’ve harmed (Proverbs 28:13). In the divine economy, there’s no such thing as being right with God when you’ve done another person wrong, haven’t repented, and haven’t made amends for what you’ve done. Such a person will be outside of the will and blessings of God until he makes things right with God and man (Matthew 5:23-24; 7:12; 22:37-39).

God will not answer the prayer of any person who does not honor and obey His Word and if a person has an outstanding offense He wants them to clear up these matters (Proverbs 28:9, 13).

The LORD requires that His people “examine” and “judge” themselves.

“Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves. Know ye not your own selves, how that Jesus Christ is in you, except ye be reprobates? 2 Corinthians 13:5

Examine and honest judge yourself and amend your ways or God will judge you.

“For if we would judge ourselves, we should not be judged. 32 But when we are judged, we are chastened of the Lord, that we should not be condemned with the world.” 1 Corinthians 11:31-32

Divine wisdom and mercy would have the offending, backslidden believer to be restored and He has chosen His people to be His “ministers of reconciliation” in such matters due to desiring that none should perish (2 Corinthians 5:18; 2 Peter 3:9).

When the believer forgives and restores an unrepentant sinning saint, giving that approval, they short circuit the repentance needed in the offending party and without which God will not forgive them. So, they stand in danger of hell fire.

Also, when we restore a departed saint who has not truly repented before God and rendered the fruit of true repentance by sincerely admitting and apologizing to us, we bring a “swine” back into our lives who will certainly stab us in the back again (Matthew 7:6). Jesus instructed us not to do this.

When you allow an offending person back into your life without them having truly repent and show that by their fruits, you have brought a swine in to wreak more havoc.

If you seek to reconcile with someone who has clearly attacked you without their real, sincere repentance before God and confession to you of their wrong doing, it’s just going to be a patch job that will again end tragically. They are still a “swine” until after they hearken to the LORD’s conviction and repent.

Jesus instructed us:

“Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you.” Matthew 7:6

“Wait, the Bible says we must forgive no matter what.”

Good point. Can we seek to sort this out as we seek out the whole counsel of Scripture? Jesus says:

“So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.” Matthew 18:35

This is in context with a man who was wronged and humbling asking for forgiveness. Read Matthew 18:21-35 for the context.

Are we to forgive no matter what or are we to forgive freely, unlimited those who truly repent? Perhaps “forgive” in this context below is dealing with restoring that person back to fellowship.

“IF he repent”

The words of Jesus immediately preceding the above passage are very important….

The LORD is a God of Restoration! | God’s Desire to have Unity Among the Brethren

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Eating the Fat, and Drinking the Sweet! [podcast]

Mourning Trumps Merriment in Christ’s Kingdom

PRAYER: Heavenly Father, I’d like to walk in Your bless-ed joy, filling my life to overflowing, no matter what’s transpiring. LORD, I ask You to do Your deeper work in my heart, in my life. Please set apart my life to truly glorify You, being full of the fruits of Your righteousness. In Jesus’ Name, amen.

Everyone desires the joy of the LORD, right? Yes, yet only those who are willing to devour His Word – to get it into their hearts and keep it flowing into their hearts, will experience that great joy of the LORD which is our strength! In context, the joy of the LORD is the strength of those who read it, hear it, embrace it, adhere to it, and keep it flowing into their mind and heart daily! (Nehemiah 8:8, 10)

“So they read in the book in the law of God distinctly (directly), and gave the sense, and caused them to understand the reading. … 10 Then he said unto them, Go your way, eat the fat, and drink the sweet, and send portions unto them for whom nothing is prepared: for this day is holy unto our Lord: neither be ye sorry; for the joy of the LORD is your strength.” Nehemiah 8:8, 10

After they had feasted on God’s Word, the elders of Israel said to them: You are now full of the Word. Now “Go your way”, that is, go home and be blessed to “send portions” of the bounty of the LORD you’ve been filled with today to overflowing. “Freely ye have received, freely give.” (Matthew 10:8) Let your cup run over and bless others! Let your light shine into others, may your cup run over onto others, to bless them with the bountiful blessings of the LORD you have received.

We have to eat the fat and drink the sweet of the Word of God to be filled with the joy of the LORD which is our strength!

“Thy words were found, and I did eat them; and thy word was unto me the joy and rejoicing of mine heart: for I am called by thy name, O LORD God of hosts.” Jeremiah 15:16

Nourishing the Body of Christ

“If thou put the brethren in remembrance of these things, thou shalt be a good minister of Jesus Christ, nourished up in the words of faith and of good doctrine, whereunto thou hast attained.” 1 Timothy 4:6

DO people know they can find the rich treasures of God’s Word when they walk into your life, when they visit your social media page? (Colossians 3:16) Will they be “nourished” by the milk and meat of God’s bless-ed Word when they are graced to be in your company?

“There is treasure to be desired and oil in the dwelling of the wise.” Proverbs 21:20

Holy Father, we ask You in the name of Jesus to make us happy in Jesus as You’ve forgiven and freed us from our sin and so of all people on Your earth, only Your people can be truly happy in Thee dear LORD. Please bless each of Your beloved saints to be anointed for the death and burial of the self life and raised up in Your blessed resurrection grace and joy. In Jesus’ name let it be dear LORD.

“These things have I spoken unto you, that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full.” John 15:11

Joy in the LORD

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Gethsemane Preceded Calvary

“And he was withdrawn from them about a stone’s cast, and kneeled down, and prayed, 42 Saying, Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done. 43 And there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him. 44 And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly: and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground.” Luke 22:42-44

“He must increase, but I must decrease.” John 3:30

“Always bearing about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our body. 11 For we which live are alway delivered unto death for Jesus’ sake, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our mortal flesh. 12 So then death worketh in us, but life in you.” 2 Corinthians 4:10-12

“And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me. 24 For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it. 25 For what is a man advantaged, if he gain the whole world, and lose himself, or be cast away?” Luke 9:23-25

Shall We Freshly Declare the Cross to be Front and Center in our Personal Lives?

“I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.” Galatians 2:20

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“Rend Your Heart, and Not Your Garments” [podcast]

Who Does God Look to? Who Does God Dwell in?

Beware of any man pretending to represent Christ who isn’t praying and preaching for you to be possessed by a humble and contrite heart.

“Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew 5:3

“‘Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven’ (Matthew 5:3). A low condition. ‘Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted’ (Matthew 5:4). To mourn over our sin and our utter wickedness before a holy and righteous God. Those are the ones who will receive the comfort and ‘joy in the Holy Ghost’ (Romans 14:17).” Karen Cochran

Abandoning Our Own Sin, Our Own Way, for God and His Better Way!

To “rend your heart” is a biblical phrase meaning to tear open your heart in radical sincerity, true humility, and genuine repentance.

The phrase comes from Joel 2:13 in the Bible: “Rend your heart and not your garments and return to the Lord your God.”

One source notes the following:

“Context and Deeper Meaning:

Cultural Background: In ancient times, the Jewish people would tear (rend) their clothes as a public, highly visible display of grief or repentance.
The Spiritual Message: God is warning that outward rituals (like ripping clothing) are meaningless if the heart remains unchanged. Rending your heart implies breaking through your pride, letting go of excuses, and being completely vulnerable and authentic before God.
The Reward: The verse goes on to say that God is “gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love.” Tearing open your heart allows you to experience His forgiveness and restore your relationship with Him.”

To see an example of rending one’s physical garment in representation of rending their heart, see Acts 14:11-18.

Where is the LORD Looking?

“But the Lord said unto Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7

“Therefore also now, saith the Lord, turn ye even to me with all your heart, and with fasting, and with weeping, and with mourning: 13 and rend your heart, and not your garments, and turn unto the Lord your God: for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of the evil. 14Who knoweth if he will return and repent, and leave a blessing behind him; even a meat offering and a drink offering unto the Lord your God” Joel 2:12-14

“What a gracious invitation is contained in these words. How tenderly the Lord reasons with his people. And what an encouraging assurance it folds up with. Reader! do not fail to observe that this call of the Lord, the accompanying grace to incline the heart to the observance of it is implied. It is most blessed ever to remember that when the Lord thus comes forth in his endearing invitations, he is secretly inclining the heart to accept them. Grace must first enter the heart, or there will be no inclination to obey.” Robert Hawker

“Jeremiah’s message was never meant to leave the heart in despair. Every warning from God carried an invitation to return. The Lord does not expose empty religion to shame His people, but to heal them. Repentance is not the loss of hope, it is the beginning of hope. Christ still receives every soul that comes with humility, and He gives living faith where there was only habit, peace where there was only fear, and joy where there was only emptiness. The call remains the same today, to draw near to Him with a sincere heart, trusting that His mercy is always greater than our weakness.” Dan Blincoe

A Fresh Start with God Always Begins with Humility and True Repentance

“Repent ye therefore, and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, when the times of refreshing shall come from the presence of the Lord.” Acts 3:19

Concerning rending our hearts before the LORD, one source notes:

The classic Bible passage on this concept is Joel 2:13, where God commands: “Rend your heart and not your garments”. In ancient biblical culture, tearing (or “rending”) one’s physical clothing was a customary, visible display of extreme grief, despair, or repentance. Through the prophet Joel, God is essentially telling His people: Stop doing the empty, outward religious ritual of tearing your clothes to show everyone how sorry you are. Instead, let me see true, inward brokenness over your sins.

Examples of Rending Physical Garments

In the Bible, the physical act of tearing clothes was used as a dramatic expression of deep emotion in several well-known narratives:

Joseph’s Brothers (Genesis 37:29, 34): When Reuben realized Joseph was not in the pit, and later when the brothers brought Joseph’s blood-stained coat to Jacob, they tore their clothes in grief and despair.
Job (Job 1:20): After hearing that he had lost all his wealth and his children, Job stood up and tore his robe as an outward sign of his overwhelming sorrow.
King David (2 Samuel 1:11-12): When David received news of the deaths of King Saul and Jonathan, he and his men tore their clothes to mourn.
The High Priest (Matthew 26:65): In a dramatic display of hypocritical outrage, the high priest tore his own garments when Jesus declared He was the Son of God, falsely accusing Him of blasphemy.

The Spiritual Meaning of “Rending the Heart”

The concept of “rending the heart” contrasts an outward show with inward reality.

Genuine Repentance: Tearing your heart means being vulnerable, acknowledging your brokenness, and deeply repenting of sin before God.
Prioritizing Relationships over Rituals: God desires a sincere heart—true sorrow and a desire to change—more than he desires traditional religious pageantry or dramatic, public displays of grief.
The Promise of Forgiveness: In Joel 2:13, the command to rend the heart is immediately followed by the promise of grace: “Return to the LORD your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love”.

God sees beyond our external habits and religious actions, requiring instead a humble, contrite heart to fully experience His mercy.”

God’s Mercy

“Therefore also now, saith the LORD, turn ye even to me with all your heart, and with fasting, and with weeping, and with mourning: 13 And rend your heart, and not your garments, and turn unto the LORD your God: for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of the evil. 14 Who knoweth if he will return and repent, and leave a blessing behind him; even a meat offering and a drink offering unto the LORD your God?” Joel 2:12-14

In God’s Word, where we see men who tear open their garments…. This holds the illustration of rending our hearts before the LORD.

Don’t render outward tearing, no, rather, tear open your inner man, your heart—be honest, sincere, exposed, and vulnerable to the LORD whom you trust.

Let’s attempt to get at, to ascertain what God is commanding of His beloved people to do in this “rend your heart” passage.

“Joel 2:13: Rend your heart—Let it not be merely a rending of your garments, but let your hearts be truly contrite. Merely external worship and hypocritical pretensions will only increase the evil, and cause God to meet you with heavier judgments.

For he is gracious—Good and benevolent in his own nature.

Merciful—Pitying and forgiving, as the effect of goodness and benevolence.

Slow to anger —He is not easily provoked to punish, because he is gracious and merciful.

Of great kindness—Exuberant goodness to all them that return to him.

And repenteth him of the evil—Is ever ready to change his purpose to destroy, when he finds the culprit willing to be saved. See the notes on Exo_34:6, Exo_34:7.” Adam Clarke

“Joel 2:12-14: III. DIVINE APPEAL TO JUDAH TO REPENT (2:12-14)
Even now, the LORD calls the people to repentance. It is not too late to return to Him. But it must be more than outward ritual. Their turning was to be with all their heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning.” Believer’s Bible Commentary

To rend our hearts is the consistent message, mandate of God to His people of all ages and eras.

“The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.” Psalms 34:18

“The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.” Psalms 51:17

In Joel 2 the LORD reminds those who are backslidden that He “is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of the evil. 14 Who knoweth if he will return and repent, and leave a blessing behind him; even a meat offering and a drink offering unto the LORD your God? …”

They must meet His stated conditions to receive His blessings ….

He promises that He will forgive them as they…..

“Joel 2:12-27: THE AVERTING OF JUDGMENT
To rend the garment is easy, but a broken and contrite heart can be imparted only by the grace of the Holy Spirit. The love of God should bring us to repentance. He takes no pleasure in our miseries and if men repent and turn from their sin they find an immediate and loving welcome to the Father’s heart and home. Joel had called for the trumpet to announce war; he now directs the trumpet blast to summon the people, from the highest to the lowest, to plead for help. Prayer and true repentance and faith bring an immediate answer. As the husband yearns over his erring but repentant wife, and is indignant with those who have maltreated her, so will Jehovah remove from us, when we turn to Him, those who have cruelly oppressed us.
The great things Jehovah did against Egypt and Babylon are an earnest of what He will do again. The earth (and all the creation of God) … have good reason to rejoice in what awaits them. God promises not only to forgive sin, but to make us happy and well provided as if the locust and cankerworm had never settled upon our lives.” FB Meyer

Religious hypocrites, counterfeits, emphasize the outward to cover their inner darkness, rebellion.

“Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have omitted the weightier matters of the law, judgment, mercy, and faith: these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone. 24 Ye blind guides, which strain at a gnat, and swallow a camel. 25 Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within they are full of extortion and excess. Matthew 23:23-25

“He answered and said unto them, Well hath Esaias prophesied of you hypocrites, as it is written, This people honoureth me with their lips, but their heart is far from me.” Mark 7:6

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