by Martin Bobgan, PhD.
Do children and adults really need self-esteem? Does low self-esteem lead to serious life problems? Should parents attempt to build self-esteem in their children? Does the Bible encourage self-esteem? Many Christians have assumptions about self-esteem. But, what does the Bible say? What does research say?
The Genesis of Self-Esteem
The self-esteem movement has its most recent roots in clinical psychology, namely in the personality theories of such men as William James, Alfred Adler, Erich Fromm, Abraham Maslow, and Carl Rogers. It became further popularized by their many followers. Nevertheless, the roots of the self-esteem movement reach further back into human history.
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The self-esteem movement began in the third chapter of Genesis. Initially Adam and Eve were God-conscious and aware of one another and their surroundings rather than being self-conscious. Their awareness of themselves was incidental and peripheral to their focus on God and one another. Adam realized that Eve was bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh, but he was not self-aware in the same sense that his descendants would be. Self was not the issue until the Fall.
Partaking of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil did not bring godly wisdom. It brought guilt, fear, and separation from God. Thus, when Adam and Eve heard God approaching, they hid in the bushes. But God saw them and asked, “Who told thee that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?” (Genesis 3:11).
Sinful Self
Adam and Eve answered with the first example of self-justification. First Adam blamed Eve and God, and then Eve blamed the serpent. The fruit of the knowledge of good and evil spawned the sinful self with all of its self-love, self-esteem, self-acceptance, self-justification, self-righteousness, self-actualization, self-denigration, self-pity and other forms of self-focus and self-centeredness.
The present Self-Etc. movement is thus rooted in Adam and Eve’s sin. Through the centuries mankind has continued to feast at the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, which has spread its branches of worldly wisdom. It has branched out into the vain philosophies of men and, more recently, the “scientized” philosophies and metaphysics of modern psychology.
Religious incantations for self-worth, self-love, and self-acceptance ooze out of the TV tube, drift across radio waves, and entice through advertising. From the cradle to the grave, self-promoters promise to cure all of society’s ills through doses of self-esteem, self-worth, self-acceptance, and self-love. And everyone, or nearly everyone echoes the refrain: “You just need to love and accept yourself the way you are. You just need to forgive yourself” and “I just have to accept myself the way I am. I’m worth it. I am a lovable, valuable, forgivable person.”
Christian Response to the World
How is the Christian to combat the thinking of the world, which glorifies the self and places self at the center as the be-all and end-all of existence? How is the Christian to be faithful to our Lord’s command to be in the world, but not of the world? Can he adopt and adapt the popular philosophy/psychology of his culture, or must he stand apart as one who has been set apart by God and view his culture by the light of the Word? Jesus said:
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30).
Here is a call to give up one’s own way and to come under the yoke of humility and service – an emphasis on yoking – on a teaching and living relationship. Jesus described His call for followers in different words, but to the same relationship and with the same intent, when He said:
If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it (Matthew 16:24-25).
No Self-Love Commandment
Jesus does not command self-love, but rather love for God and love for one another. The Bible presents an entirely different basis for love than humanistic psychology preaches. Rather than promoting self-love as the basis for loving others, the Bible says that God’s love is the true source. Human love is mixed with self-love and may be ultimately self-serving. But God’s love is self-giving. Therefore, when Jesus calls His disciples to deny self and to take up His yoke and His cross, He is calling them to a self-giving love, not a self-satisfying love. Until the advent of humanistic psychology and its heavy influence in the church, Christians generally thought of self-esteem as a sinful attitude.
In Part Two of this series, we will look at what the Bible says about self-love, particularly the Second Great Commandment, and what research says about self-esteem.
Part Two
Even though the Bible does not teach self-love, self-esteem, self-worth, or self-actualization as virtues, helps, or goals, a vast number of present-day Christians have been deceived by the self-teachings of humanistic psychology. Rather than resisting the enticement of the world they become culture-bound. Not only do they not resist the tidal wave of selfism; they are riding the crest of self-esteem, self- acceptance, and self-love. One can hardly tell the difference between the Christian and the non-Christian in the area of the self, except that the Christian adds God as the main source for his self-esteem, self-acceptance, self-worth, and self-love.
Through slogans, one-liners, and twisted Scripture, many Christians jump on the existential bandwagon of humanistic psychology and set up their own cheering section. Thus, any criticism voiced against the teachings of self-worth, self-love, and self-esteem is regarded as ipso facto proof that the speaker wants people to be miserable. Moreover, any criticism against the self-esteem movement is seen as dangerous to society, since self-esteem is considered to be the panacea for its ills. Then, in the church, if one does not wholly endorse a self-esteem theology, he is accused of promoting worm theology.
If there is one thing the world and many in the church have in common these days, it’s the psychology of self-esteem. Although Christians may disagree about some of the nuances of self-esteem, self-worth, and self-acceptance, and even on some of the finer points of definition and how it is attained, too many have joined forces against what they believe is a formidable enemy – low self-esteem. Yet, even the world cannot justify promoting high self-esteem through its own methods of research.
No Research Justification for Self-Esteem
A few years ago the California legislature passed a bill creating the California Task Force to Promote Self-Esteem and Personal and Social Responsibility. The legislature funded the bill with $245,000 a year for three years, for a total of $735,000. The twofold title of the Task Force was quite an assumption. No one has ever demonstrated that promoting self-esteem is in any way related to personal and social responsibility. Nor has anyone proved that all those who exhibit personal and social responsibility have high self-esteem. Self-esteem and social and personal responsibility actually appear to be negatively rather than positively related.
The Mission Statement of the Task Force is as follows:
- Seek to determine whether self-esteem, and personal and social responsibility are the keys to unlocking the secrets of healthy human development so that we can get to the roots of and develop effective solutions for major social problems and to develop and provide for every Californian the latest knowledge and practices regarding the significance of self-esteem, and personal and social responsibility.1
The Task Force believed that esteeming oneself and growing in self-esteem would reduce “dramatically the epidemic levels of social problems we currently face.”2
Is There a Positive Relationship Between High or Low Self-Esteem and Personal and Social Responsibility?
In order to investigate this relationship the state Task Force hired eight professors from the University of California to look at the research on self-esteem as it relates to the six following areas:
1. Crime, violence and recidivism.
2. Alcohol and drug abuse.
3. Welfare dependency.
4. Teenage pregnancy.
5. Child and spousal abuse.
6. Children failing to learn in school.
Seven of the professors researched the above areas and the eighth professor summarized the results. The results were then published in a book titled The Social Importance of Self-Esteem.3 Has the relationship been established between self-esteem and social problems? David L. Kirk, syndicated writer for the San Francisco Examiner,4 said it bluntly:
- That . . . scholarly tome, The Social Importance of Self-Esteem, summarizes all the research on the subject in the stultifyingly boring prose of wannabe scientists. Save yourself the 40 bucks the book costs and head straight for the conclusion: There is precious little evidence that self-esteem is the cause of our social ills.
Even though they searched for a connection between low self-esteem and problematic behavior, they could not find a cause and effect link. However, more recent studies indicate a definite relationship between violent behavior and high self-esteem. Nevertheless, faith in self-esteem dies hard and schools continue to work on building high self-esteem.
Worse than the continuance of self-esteem teachings in the world is the faith that Christians continue to place in self-esteem and self-worth teachings. Thus, the secular self-esteem movement is not a frontal attack against the Bible with the battle-lines clearly displayed. Instead it is skillfully subversive and is truly the work, not of flesh and blood, but of principalities, powers, the rulers of darkness of this world, and spiritual wickedness in high places, just as delineated by Paul near the end of Ephesians. The sad thing is that many Christians are not alert to the dangers. More than we can number are being subtly deceived into another gospel: the gospel of self.
Biblical Love
Jesus calls His own into a love relationship with Himself and with one another. Their joy is to be found in Him, not in self. Their love comes from His love for them. Thus, their love for one another does not come from self-love or self-esteem, nor does it enhance self-esteem. The emphasis is on relationship, fruitfulness, and readiness to be rejected by the world. A believer’s identification is in Jesus to the point of suffering and following Him to the cross. Only through strained semantics, labored logic and exploited exegesis can one even attempt to demonstrate that self-esteem is biblical or even a part of the church tradition or teaching.
The focus of love in the Bible is upward and outward instead of inward. Love is both an attitude and action to one another. And while love may include sentiment and emotional affection, it is primarily volitional action for the glory of God and the good of others. Thus when Jesus said, “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength” (Mark 12:30), He was saying that all of our being is to be committed to loving and, therefore, pleasing God. Love for God is expressed with a thankful heart committed to doing what pleases God according to what has been revealed in the Bible. It is not a grudging kind of obedience, but an eagerness to conform to His gracious will and to agree with God that He is the source and standard for all that is right and good.
The Second commandment is an extension or expression of the First Commandment: “Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself” (Mark 12:31). John elaborates on this. He describes the sequence of love. In contrast to the teachers of self-love, who say that people cannot love God and others until they love themselves, John says that love originates with God and then extends to others:
- We love Him because He first loved us. If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen? And this commandment have we from Him, that he who loveth God love his brother also (1 John 4:19-21).
God loved us first, which enables us to love Him, which then expresses itself in love for one another.
From Adam’s first breath, mankind was designed to live in relationship with God, not as autonomous selves. The entire Bible rests on that relationship, for after Jesus answered the Pharisee by saying that the Greatest Commandment is to love God and the second is to love neighbor as oneself, He said: “On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets” (Matthew 22:40). Jesus came to save us from self and to reestablish that love relationship for which we were created. Through the centuries books have been written about loving God and loving one another. However, today the church is increasingly inundated with books telling us how to love ourselves better, esteem ourselves more, accept ourselves no matter what, and build our own self-worth.
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End Notes
1 California Task Force to Promote Self-Esteem and Personal and Social Responsibility. “1987 Annual Report to the Governor and the Legislature,” p. V.
2 Andrew M. Mecca, “Chairman’s Report.” Esteem, Vol. 2, No. 1, February 1988, p. 1.
3 Andrew M. Mecca, Neil J. Smelser, and John Vasconcellos, eds. The Social Importance of Self-Esteem. Berkeley: University of California Press, 1989.
4 David L. Kirk, “Lack of Self Esteem is Not the Root of All Ills.” Santa Barbara News-Press, 15 January 1990.
More on PsychoHeresy here.
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Abiding
Acquaint now thyself with him, and be at peace: thereby good shall come unto thee [podcast]

Here’s why Jesus came:
“And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.” John 17:3
There is nothing – NO-THING – more important in your life than your relationship with Christ.
Job 22
“Acquaint now thyself with him, and be at peace: thereby good shall come unto thee. 22 Receive, I pray thee, the law from his mouth, and lay up his words in thine heart. 23 If thou return to the Almighty, thou shalt be built up, thou shalt put away iniquity far from thy tabernacles. 24 Then shalt thou lay up gold as dust, and the gold of Ophir as the stones of the brooks. 25 Yea, the Almighty shall be thy defence, and thou shalt have plenty of silver. 26 For then shalt thou have thy delight in the Almighty, and shalt lift up thy face unto God. 27 Thou shalt make thy prayer unto him, and he shall hear thee, and thou shalt pay thy vows. 28 Thou shalt also decree a thing, and it shall be established unto thee: and the light shall shine upon thy ways. 29 When men are cast down, then thou shalt say, There is lifting up; and he shall save the humble person. 30 He shall deliver the island of the innocent; and it is delivered by the pureness of thine hands.” Job 22:21-30
“lay up his words in thine heart” v22 – WITH the learning of each new verse of Holy Scripture, each new Bible truth, your knowledge and understanding of the LORD and His kingdom is expanded.
“Let thine heart retain my words.” Proverbs 4:4
“I have seen an end of all perfection: but thy commandment is exceeding broad. 97 MEM. O how love I thy law! it is my meditation all the day. 98 Thou through thy commandments hast made me wiser than mine enemies: for they are ever with me. 99 I have more understanding than all my teachers: for thy testimonies are my meditation. 100 I understand more than the ancients, because I keep thy precepts.” Psalms 119:96-100
“God’s acquaintance is not made hurriedly.” EM Bounds
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Abiding
Dwelling in the Secret Place of the Most High [podcast]

“He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.” Psalms 91:1
Of the Bible phrase “secret place of the most High”, one source notes:
“‘The secret place of the Most High’: is a spiritual state of intimacy, trust, and absolute protection in God, referenced in Psalm 91:1. It is not a physical location, but rather a hidden sanctuary found in the heart of God, accessed through prayer and a surrendered life.”
“And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.” John 17:3
Prayer communion is inseparably connected with knowing God (John 17:3).
Knowing the Father and the Son is the whole purpose for which He made you.
“That which we have seen and heard declare we unto you, that ye also may have fellowship with us: and truly our fellowship is with the Father, and with his Son Jesus Christ. 4 And these things write we unto you, that your joy may be full.” 1 John 1:3-4
Beloved of God, you have a relationship with your Maker, not religion.
To know Him, we must seek Him. He promises us that as we seek Him, He will be found of us!
“if thou seek him, he will be found of thee.” 1 Chronicles 28:9
He promises to manifest Himself exclusively to those who “diligently seek him.” (1 Chronicles 16:11; John 14:21-23, etc.)
God is not hiding and yet He is not available to the casual seeker. Only those who “diligently seek him” will be known as His, will experience in real relationship with the LORD.
“But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.” Matthew 6:33
“A sinning man stops praying. A praying man stops sinning.” – Leonard Ravenhill
“And in the morning, rising up a great while before day, he went out, and departed into a solitary place, and there prayed.” Mark 1:35
Anyone not praying is not seeking God and has already fallen away (Luke 12:40).
“A glorious high throne from the beginning is the place of our sanctuary.” Jeremiah 17:12
The LORD’s people are known as His “house” and He calls them His “house of prayer.”
“And said unto them, It is written, My house shall be called the house of prayer; but ye have made it a den of thieves.” Matthew 21:13
Those who truly love and worship the LORD perpetually seek His holy face and that’s called prayer.
“Pray without ceasing.” 1 Thessalonians 5:17
“Seek his face continually”
“Seek the LORD and his strength, seek his face continually.” 1 Chronicles 16:11
Spending quality moments with God is your best time spent (Matthew 6:6).
“The preaching of the Word of the Lord fails to run and be glorified from many causes. The difficulty may lie with the preacher himself, should his outward conduct be out of harmony with the rule of the Scriptures and his own profession. The word lived must be in accord with the word delivered; the life must be in harmony with the sermon. The preacher’s spirit and behavior out of the pulpit must run parallel with the Word of the LORD spoken in the pulpit. Otherwise a man is an obstacle in the success of his own message.” E.M. Bounds, E.M. Bounds On Prayer, p. 421
“A sinning man stops praying. A praying man stops sinning.” – Leonard Ravenhill
“The men who have done mighty things for God have always been mighty in prayer, have well understood the possibilities of prayer, and made the most of these possibilities. The Son of God, the first of all and the mightiest of all, has shown us the all-potent and far reaching possibilities of prayer. Paul was mighty for because he knew, how to use, and how to get others to use, the mighty spiritual forces of prayer.” EM Bounds, The Complete Works of E.M. Bounds on Prayer, P. 341
“It has been said that no great work in literature or in science was ever wrought by a man who did not love solitude. We may lay it down as an elemental principle of religion, that no large growth in holiness was ever gained by one who did not take time to be often long alone with God.” Austin Phelps
“Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.” Matthew 26:41
Can anyone possibly NOT enter into temptation who is not living a life of prayer? Not possible. If you are not living a life of prayer, praying “without ceasing,” you ARE living in sin. Wonder no more. Fresh repentance before God needed (Hosea 10:12; 14:1-2; 1 Thessalonians 5:17; Hebrews 4:14-16).
It’s the cross – where you die so Christ can be preferred, can reign in your personal daily life.
“Ye are dead and your life is hid with Christ in God.” Colossians 3:3
Lotta Prayer
Lotta Power
vs
Lil Prayer
Lil power
No such thing as an overcoming, victorious child of God who doesn’t meet daily with God in prayer communion.
Let’s read the words of our LORD Jesus again – aloud:
“Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.” Matthew 26:41
PRAYER: Holy Father, I come to You now, in repentance, asking You to please forgive my self-idolatry, rebellion, pride, sinful unbelief, and prayerlessness. Please wash me clean in Thy blood dear LORD Jesus. Unite my heart to fear Thy name. In Jesus’ name. Amen.
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America
The Over Population Delusion Exposed [video]

FACT: There are 100 people groups that are uncontacted and remain isolated from modern societies which is further proof of over population being an induced myth.
FACTS are dangerous to those who perpetrate lying propaganda. Example:
Threat: There Were 93,331 Drug Overdose Deaths in the US in 2020 and ZERO Deaths from Climate Change in the US in 2020
While these lying agents of the enemy of all souls push the “danger” of “global warming,” the simple facts eviscerate their agenda.
ALL of Creation, Including the Earth and its People, are Exclusively God’s Property
The LORD owns the earth, not you, luciferian. You are an antichrist sinner, less than a spec of dust in contrast to the Almighty who said “The earth is the LORD’S, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein.” (Psalms 24:1)
Depopulation Devils Exposed! The earth is the LORD’s and He said He wants it populated! (Psalms 24:1) Those who participate in deciding who lives and who dies are murderers in the eyes of the Almighty. And, any person encouraging people not to have children is encouraging something that is against what God stated and is a divine command that is still in full force – “And God blessed them, and God said unto them, BE FRUITFUL, AND MULTIPLY, AND REPLENISH THE EARTH, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.” (Genesis 1:28)
“Those who believe the over population myth should humbly read the Bible and it will wipe out their ignorance. Especially the book of Genesis.” Shadrack Rotich
No such thing as over population. Anyone who believes that has been deceived by the murderous depopulationists. Not long ago a study was done which proved that every person in the world could live comfortably in the state of Texas. The LORD who made the earth, made it to be inhabited and provide everything for such to happen. These are antichrists who are against the LORD and His plan to fill the earth with people (Genesis 1:28). Over population is a lie to push the agenda of depopulating the earth by murdering billions. It’s time to make peace with your Maker, the Judge of your eternal soul – before it’s too late. Peace with God
Those who believe in this lie of over population are bearing false witness against the Almighty and making a foolish, ungrounded indictment upon our Maker. Totally gullible. Bought the lies. It’s all an evil agenda to communize the world, and a communist world dictator is coming, the antichrist. Communism has never worked and never will – except temporarily for those ruling over the masses. Communism is the few self-appointed elites murderously ruling with tyranny. Only deceived souls are buying this delusion.
Below is a lost soul disagreeing with my above statements:
“The world is grossly over populated. We could do with a few generations who don’t want to have children. If everyone just kept popping them out like you suggest, how does the world sustain that many people?” Amy
MY REPLY:
Who the heck do you think you are pretending to decide who can live and who must die to suit the delusions you’ve gullibly bought into? You are completely selfish, sinner. What if someone, some other luciferian decides that YOU are expendable? – That you don’t matter and should be eliminated? Do you know what Jesus’ Golden Rule states?
“And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise.” Luke 6:31
“The earth is THE LORD’s” not yours (Psalms 24:1) One thing’s for certain – There is a God and you are not Him.
“The earth is the LORD’S, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein.” Psalms 24:1
The LORD made the earth and doesn’t need puny finite beings like us “deciding” that there is not enough room for more people. Total selfishness. It’s not up to YOU to decide if God’s green earth is over populated. You are completely brain washed, indoctrinated into the religion of self-worship, secular humanism. Not long ago an extensive study showed that the whole population of the world could fit in the state of Texas, each person and family with a large piece of land. Case closed. Junk science. Lies.
Regrettably, you don’t yet see the end game agenda of these scams you’ve bought into. The lie of over population and the murderous depopulation agenda is are tools of the evil dictators in order to accomplish global dominance. This will bring the most horrific times the earth has ever seen under the antichrist.
“For then shall be great tribulation, such as was not since the beginning of the world to this time, no, nor ever shall be. 22 And except those days should be shortened, there should no flesh be saved: but for the elect’s sake those days shall be shortened.” Matthew 24:21-22
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